The Infinite Hike

The Infinite Hike
By Ross Moore

The moment had finally come where only the EF strongest would survive. I had been training months for the trek and no matter how many laps I swam in the pool I knew the hike would still be the most strenuous physical activity known to man. I would have to eat a hearty breakfast if I wanted to survive the treacherous journey so I ate thirty-two raw eggs. After breakfast I stretched for an hour because I did not want to pull a muscle, and it was time to head for the summit of La Fortuna waterfall. The starting group consisted of about twenty brave warriors, however even the strongest perish under conditions such as these. We left at 4:00 A.M. and had a fourteen-hour hike ahead of us without food, water, or bathroom facilities. An hour into the hike a hearse came by to pick up any bodies that had ceased to meet the demanding level of intensity it took to accomplish the task. Six warriors had perished by that point in time and others were still dropping like flies. On the side of the road skeletons could be seen from others that had tried the feat and failed miserably. Ten hours into the hike I could feel the fatigue set in and my legs were burning, I was suffering from severe dehydration and felt as if I would no longer go on. Then Sir Brunsington gave me a sip of liquid gold from his holy grail and I felt like I could bench press the world. I ran the next four hours powering up the seventy percent gradient incline averaging twelve miles an hour. When I had finally reached the top I knew that all of my intense training of waking up every morning at 5:00 A.M. and running multiple marathons had paid off. In the end only four survived the intense hike and around fifteen died of dehydration or were victims of cannibalism. All I can say is Costa Rica is tight…pura vida baby.